TMS Muse of the Week: Valerie Bertinelli

(Forrest Anderson)

One of the most surprisingly paired famous couples of all time is Eddie van Halen & Valerie Bertinelli. He’s a guitar god for a whole generation and a member of one of the biggest bands from the 1980s [Van Halen]. She’s America’s Sweetheart every week as the younger daughter, Barbara Cooper, on CBS’ “One Day at a Time” (1975-1984). Who would have thought these two would find each other, let alone be married for over twenty years with a son? Have you ever noticed they kind of look alike? How did they even meet? Well, depending on who you ask, you’ll get a few different answers to that last question. According to Valerie’s 2008 memoir Losing It, her brother invited her to a 1980 Van Halen concert in Shreveport, LA and the siblings met the band members backstage, with the actress and the guitarist hitting it off instantly. But in Eddie’s bandmate, David Lee Roth’s own memoir, Crazy from the Heat (1997), he claims Valerie was eager to meet him; but he evidently passed her over to Eddie. Whatever the case, the attraction was clearly real.

A screen star and a recording star has always been an interesting combo to me. Both can be equally successful, publicized and wealthy, yet something sort of feels off vibes wise. A lot of the time these pairings usually aren’t endgame. Faye Dunaway & Peter Wolf, Eddie Fisher & Debbie Reynolds, Bobby Darin & Sandra Dee, Renee Zellweger & Jack White, Jon Bon Jovi & Diane Lane, etc. Despite the two eerily sharing the same adorable, brown-eyed, brown hair qualities, I’ve always thought Eddie and Valerie were a cute couple. He seemed down to earth for a rockstar and she’s a darling. I’m a Van Halen fan, so it was nice to discover my favorite member of the group was married for most of their prime compared to his bandmates like David and Eddie’s brother Alex. Though Valerie seems sweet enough, I’m actually not super familiar with her career, even with the many hit sitcoms. Something unusual about her resume is that she’s been steadily working since age 15, yet has made only a total of three theatrically released films. Her acting gig is strictly TV. And though Van Halen fans are still throwing accusations of nepotism at Wolfgang van Halen for replacing original bassist Michael Anthony in 2006, it is great the parents have a good relationship with their son.

(Barry King)

But imagine how bummed I was to find in Valerie’s book all the secret marital issues the two faced over the years. While Eddie was composing, recording and touring with VH and Valerie was gracing the covers of Teen Beat and TV Guide in between sitcom episodes; stereotypes like affairs, drugs and neglect were going on at home. My favorite description of the Van Halens’ relationship is from Valerie’s 2012 interview on Howard Stern, where she claims they were, “very boring cokeheads. We would stay home some nights and just play Uno and Yahtzee.” It might be impressive by Hollywood standards that Eddie and Valerie didn’t part until 2001. But the TV star also revealed in Losing It they actually almost separated in the late ‘80s when she found out Eddie told singer/band friend Patty Smyth that he would have asked her out if he wasn’t already married. Surprisingly, it wasn’t the cheating [on both sides according to Val] or the drugs that was the final straw in the marriage; but Eddie being in denial about his addiction to cigarettes, even when he was diagnosed with tongue cancer and refused to quit.

Fortunately, there wasn’t any animosity or drama during the divorce, and the two chose to take the mature route for the separation and continue as friends. Eventually, Eddie did recover from tongue cancer in 2002, got sober in 2008 and married stuntwoman Janie Liszewski in 2009 all while still musically active as a living legend, before sadly passing from throat cancer in 2020. Valerie also wed again—this time to a financial planner named Tom Vitale, from 2011 to 2022—while adding a series of cooking books and programs to her performing career, which now includes CBS’ “Touched by an Angel” (2001-03) and TV Land’s “Hot in Cleveland” (2010-15). Although they were at each other’s second weddings, Valerie’s vow to “never marry again” after divorcing Tom and her emotional reaction to Eddie’s death do make one wonder if there are any secret regrets. Hindsight is 20/20 and most things worth experiencing in life aren’t easy. But maybe the rockstar and the TV starlet are a good example of how we should appreciate the moment and not take it for granted. And concluding fun fact: Valerie’s favorite Van Halen song is ‘Romeo Delight,’ from the 1980 album ‘Women and Children First,’ which is the LP the band was promoting when Eddie and Valerie met.